What to Write in a Mother's Day Ecard Greeting When you Want to Be Funny Guide

By Chandler Chandler May 7, 2020

Husband to Wife:

Congrats on raising the kids and me.
I got you a bottle of wine,I know I’m the reason you need this.
You’ve handled a lot of shit...literally.
To the best wife in the world with the best body in the world.
There’s no-one I would rather complain about the kids with.
You always roll with me when I don’t replace the toilet paper roll.
Things not to say to your wife, you may not be perfect but I’m pretty close.
Understandably it’s a good time to act like I’m a closeted gay man and tidy up the house, cook you a fabulous meal and organize your closet.
Thank you for not acting like a (type) insect and eating our children.

Friend to Friend:

Have an amazing Mother’s Day to my best friend, greatest teacher and free therapist!
To someone who understands what it’s like to be a little person’s bitch.
Your support is better than my favorite bra.
Mother’s Day it’s time to relax, drink wine, and repeat.
I hope you get your 19 year-old body back for Mother’s Day.
To a friend who understands children are like farts,we can tolerate our own.
To a friend who knows mother is a noun for therapist/maid.
May your Mother’s Day celebration be more extravagant and luxurious than any of our friends.
To one who understands, a child, the gift that keeps us cleaning...
To a friend who totally gets why insects eat their young.
Wishing you a speedy recovery from mothering today.

Daughter. Son to Mother:

Thank you for acting normal in front of my friends.
Thank you for not being the most embarrassing mom on Facebook.
You gave me life, I gave you this ecard.
Thank you mom for being loving, sweet and for not cooking (insert funny food item) anymore.
To a one of a kind mom, rarer than a bloody steak.
Even though your boobs no longer appear when I cry, I still love you.
Thanks for not aborting me, love your favorite pain in the ass.
What do you get a mom, who has already received her biggest gift in life? Me!
Mom thanks for the gorgeous looks and extra portion of sass!
What’s important to say to a child who's as funny and gorgeous as her mom is - you’re welcome!
Even though you child-proofed the house, we still would never leave you. Love you mom.
You’ve always inspired me...to drink more.
To a mom who gave birth to an icon…
What you want to say but shouldn’t ...You’ve always inspired me...to date crazy people, drink more, move out of state…

Mother to Daughter:

To a one of a kind daughter, which is all we can handle frankley.
You’re good-looking, sweet, kind and at times a bit of a pain in the ass.
May your Mother’s Day be filled with magic in the air, better than unicorns farting rainbows, better than…
Being your mom makes me smile. The fact that you're stuck with me makes me laugh.
It’s not easy being mom...just look at dad...I’m just sayin’...
Don’t worry my daughter, only the first 40 years of parenting are the hardest...

To Sister:

To a sister who cleans, cooks, handles tons of crap ... who says we are the weaker sex?
Pour yourself a big glass of wine aka no guilt and relax.
To a sister who understands children are like farts and only we can tolerate our own.
To a sister who knows mother is a noun for therapist/maid.
Happy Mother’s Day to a sister who has the best sister in the world.
Wishing you a Mother’s Day as cool as your sister.
Celebrating you today, the family member that I’m least ashamed to be related to.